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Vinyl.0x's avatar

Good food, good music, good vibes

☆He ☆him ☆his
15 years old
United States of America

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Vinyl.0x's interests
Music Mitski, Alex G, Starry cat, Dandelion hands, Teen suicide
Movies Good Will Hunting (1997) Dead Poet Society (1989)
Books Sparrow by Sarah Moon, Pax by Sara Pennypacker, No Longer Human by Osamu Dazai

Suicide note?

I've contemplated how my suicide note would read.
A vignette, or poem, or individualized letters.
Nothing could capture the way I felt when I wrote it so I wouldn't even try.
Would I want to make those who read it laugh through their mourning? Perhaps make them hate me by confessing innermost thoughts, leaving them in black gowns with a bitter aftertaste the way coffee leaves a bitter film on the tongues of those who drink too fast.
But by then I'd be much too exhausted to think out multiple notes, or a singular lengthy slip of paper that I'd tuck in my pocket or cleverly stow away beneath my pillow as I fall unconscious one last time.
Would I perhaps plagiarize the final words of mine that aren't mine?
Quote a song, source my playlist, quote my favorite book that I've read too many times to count in the classroom of the only person who would get a personal letter?
How unoriginal.
But I think as I write with shaky hand--or perhaps I'd be perfectly steady-- my own unoriginal words that float clear in my own exhausted mind. An imperfect recollection of the childish muttering that I blubber out among the stinging of tears that don't come out late at night when the moon is high and dim.
"Tell them, that I was all done."
-Indigo De Souza